What is truth? The dictionary, if you can believe it, defines truth as ‘the state of being the case’. Something is a fact when it represents reality. Then it becomes hazy, saying truth is also ‘sincerity in action, character or utterance’.

Because our brain defines reality, it is not the same for everyone.  It is also a fact that our behavior and interactions are driven by much more than just the truth.

To try and explain what I am thinking, which can be utter untrue bullshit by the way, meet Jack and Jill. If you ask Jack and Jill, the couple that lives up the hill, how long they have been together, they will say forever. Of course this is not true, but to them it is. And so, the lies begin.

They have been married thirty years. When they hooked up Jack believed Jill would never change, and Jill believed that she could change Jack into what she wants in a man. None of this turned out to be true, but they still started their life together believing this and is still striving and hoping for this to come true.

The two of them produced three boys, and they believed they were the best possible parents to these kids; while believing they are blessed with the best possible children in the world, smart and beautiful and with so much potential. All of this was not quite true, but this belief sustained them when the boys got in trouble, or disappointed with bad grades, behavior or disrespect.

When they asked the boys ‘What are you and your friends doing tonight?’, the answer was always ‘Nothing’, and when asked ‘How are you doing?’ the boys always said ‘OK’. This off course was not always the truth. These boys were up to all sorts of mischief with their friends. They smoked pot, drank, and screwed around. They did these things because as a teenager you are never just ‘OK’, there is always something going on in your body or your head.

It is not much different for adults. Jack goes to a job he hates every day. He laughs at his boss’ jokes even though secretly he thinks the man is an imbecile. He would much rather be a writer, but he lacks the confidence and probably the talent, and he needs money to keep his household together.

Jack often works late at this job he hates. He does not really have that much work, and he does not get paid overtime. He does this because he just needs to be fucking alone for a few minutes every now and then.

Jill is always on a diet, but mostly follows it only when Jack is around. Jack is a man, and he does not have the same issues with weight as her because he burns more fuel she believes. This is not true, our bodies process energy the same way. It is however true that men and women have varied reasons for overeating, due to material differences in the brain. It is just easier to just believe that she is doomed to becoming obese because she is a woman.

Jill tolerates their neighbors, especially the women. She would rather prepare for a colonoscopy than chat with the neighborhood women about fat, men, recipes, and other inconsequential shit. Every day she has tea and crumpets, or tea and cake, or tea and pie, at someone’s house. On Wednesdays it is her turn to host, and she pulls out all the stops.

Jack drives a minivan even though he desires a pickup truck. Jill fakes orgasms and Jack takes Viagra just to get hard because he cannot stand the way Jill looks. They have been living this lie for years now.

When you consider Jack and Jill, and you see just how much of their lives are over the hill, you might say they just need to be honest and stop living a lie. The truth is so easy when it is someone else’s. I bet if we stop for a second and examine our own lives, we might see that we all live with a lie in some form or fashion.

We are just ordinary people, who live ordinary lives, with ordinary problems, and it is so much easier to just gloss over the things that are not perfect than upset the apple cart to get the truth. The truth is that living a life that is 100% honest and direct might be brutal and very alone. This is why we accept things that we would rather change.

To me this is the honesty of the constant lying. It is done to keep a semblance of peace and happiness. It is not healthy.

To be successful at life we must think about these things and find ways to talk about it so that we can live true and clear with no fear. We must be honest with ourselves and others and admit these honest lies, then make a true effort to remove it from our lives.

Easier said than done! Believe me, I know!