I have never fully known how to just ‘be’. There was always someone to tell me I was doing it ‘wrong’. Later in life, I realized they were also in the same boat, and part of their journey was to find fault in others, allowing them to procrastinate on their own development. Most outgrow this. Many do not. Good luck to them.

I am put together from pieces and parts,
and these do not match, mesh, or fit just right.
Despite this mess, every day I start wide-eyed,
with a mix of despair, anxiety, and ready to fight.

I've lived life a little to the left, at times with a curve to the right,
moved by what was front and center in my mind;
need, want, lust, or avoid left by my most recent fright.
Still, my mismatched parts demand a daily grind.

Forever I've lived with worry, fear, and fret, 
concerned with what kinda thing I'll become in the end.
Which piece or part will trump the rest,
or worse, might I become a fucked up blend!

Despite my competing parts, I've lived a long, often listless life,
learning that looking for happiness is a fool's errand!
All I had to do was to simply accept the never-ending internal trife,
and exist as best I could, paying my fare and fighting the occasional fire.

So in the end, I am happy to know that I am more than salt,
I'm also spiced with a bit of pepper, lemon, garlic, and malt,
never bland, not too grand, and with enough guts to take a stand
and proudly hold all my parts and all my pieces firmly in my hand.